Teenage relationships…
Bygedra deur nadinesmit op September 5, 2007
Hey…
A while ago me and a friend of mine discussed this particular issue.. Why do teenagers want and have relationships – more specific – romantic relationships??
Is it because they want to feel wanted, is it because they want to prove something? Some teenagers go so far it’s almost as if they feel justified by a boyfriends or girlfriend??
Maybe they have them just to have someone to kiss or to make out with, someone they can spend their time on rather that doing nothing and being bored…
Yes, those few relationships exist that last and really mean something, but is it really worth it? When I was in std.5 a girl told us about her experiences and how everytime you have a relationship, you give a part of yourself away, like the way you might give away a block off a slab chocolate… What do you do when you have little or nothing left when that perfect person comes along? The reason I say ‘they’ all the time, is because I exclude myself, I have never had a romantic relationship in all my life, although I currently have an amazing friend who fills the role of a boyfriend in my life…
Yes, that might sound weird but when you think about it there is only so much that you get out of a romantic relationship, especially those small meaningless ones that most teenagers have in school… all they do is break your heart and leave you perhaps empty and wanting more, in the end giving away more, wasting more…
It’s almost as if teenagers are trying to full a void in their lives and according to the media and friends and other sources, the best way to full the void is to have a romantic relationship with someone that momentarily makes your heart beat a little faster?!
They aren’t all bad I suppose but that depends on how you handle them… Sorry to say, but all I have seen caused by them is dissapointment and hurt, damn that sounds so pessimistic…! I’m a optimistic person at heart, but not a dreamer, sometimes you have to be realistic about some things, it isn’t all fairy tales and happy endings…
Some argue that these relationships train you for one day when you will have a truely meaningfull relationship and that so, these relationships as teenagers are a necessity… I don’t agree, ’cause what do they teach you?
Anyway… If you choose not to have a relationship now, there is nothing wrong with you, you might just be a little more mature that your mates…
Another thought…
cobus said
I remember telling myself the exact same thing by matric. That I was more mature, and that I didn’t have any romantic relationships. What I realized, was that I fooled myself, and went into relationships, without calling it by name. The type of relationship, although not that physical, was actually a romantic relationship. Sometimes not being honest with the type of relationship you are having can be a bigger problem.
But on the other hand, I must agree with you. There is a type of compulsive behaviour, where people need to be in a relationship simply to be in a relationship, and that’s not good
aventer said
Hmmm… Makes sense. But can it be that such relationships can cross your path? What should you do when someone asks you to be your boyfriend or girlfriend?
It probably all depends on the relationship you have…friendship, acquintances, etc… I remember Cobus telling me one day, that a romantic relationship should come out of a true friendship.
(Ek weet ek jy gaan nou van hierdie woorde hou Nina)
I have bumped my head a few times with relationships…non of them worked. I don’t believe I need a boyfriend, but it would be nice to have one… You might think and dream about it, it’s normal. It would be nice, but I can do without.
There’s nothing wrong with friendships
nadinesmit said
Hi,
I agree completely and my outlook on these relationships have been altered a little. I have these relationships and you heve them even if you’re not always aware of them.
But, we must take them as we go. I agree with Cobus, the best way to build a relationship is through friendship, I have experience of that. And I also agree with him because it compels you to know the person personally and not just halfway.
This isn’t completely making sense, but I’m working it out. I just still firmly believe that you need to be careful not to get hurt, not afraid, but careful…